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By Mark Twain

Samuel Langhorne Clemens (November 30, 1835 – April 21, 1910), larger recognized by means of his pen identify Mark Twain, was once an American writer and stand-up comedian. He wrote The Adventures of Tom Sawyer (1876) and its sequel, Adventures of Huckleberry Finn (1885), the latter known as "The nice American Novel". Twain grew up in Hannibal, Missouri, which supplied the surroundings for Huckleberry Finn and Tom Sawyer. After an apprenticeship with a printer, he labored as a typesetter and contributed articles to the newspaper of his older brother, Orion Clemens. He later turned a riverboat pilot at the Mississippi River prior to heading west to affix Orion in Nevada. He referred humorously to his singular loss of good fortune at mining, turning to journalism for the Virginia urban Territorial firm. In 1865, his funny tale, "The Celebrated leaping Frog of Calaveras County", was once released, according to a narrative he heard at Angels lodge in Angels Camp, California, the place he had spent it slow as a miner. the fast tale introduced foreign cognizance, and was once even translated into vintage Greek. His wit and satire, in prose and in speech, earned compliment from critics and friends, and he was once a pal to presidents, artists, industrialists, and ecu royalty. although Twain earned loads of cash from his writings and lectures, he invested in ventures that misplaced loads of funds, significantly the Paige Compositor, a mechanical typesetter, which failed as a result of its complexity and imprecision. within the wake of those monetary setbacks, he filed for defense from his collectors through financial disaster, and with the aid of Henry Huttleston Rogers ultimately overcame his monetary problems. Twain selected to pay all his pre-bankruptcy collectors in complete, notwithstanding he had no obligation to take action.

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Extra resources for The Awful German Language

Example text

An average sentence, in a German newspaper, is a sublime and impressive curiosity; it occupies a quarter of a column; it contains all the ten parts of speech -- not in regular order, but mixed; it is built mainly of compound words constructed by the writer on the spot, and not to be found in any dictionary -- six or seven words compacted into one, without joint or seam -- that is, without hyphens; it treats of fourteen or fifteen different subjects, each inclosed in a parenthesis of its own, with here and there extra parentheses which reinclose three or four of the minor parentheses, making pens within pens: finally, all the parentheses and reparentheses are massed together between a couple of king-parentheses, one of which is placed in the first line of the majestic sentence and the other in the middle of the last line of it -- after which comes the VERB, and you find out for the first time what the man has been talking about; and after the verb -- merely by way of ornament, as far as I can make out -- the writer shovels in " haben sind gewesen gehabt haben geworden sein," or words to that effect, and the monument is finished.

The German word for hell -- Hölle -- sounds more like helly than anything else; therefore, how necessary chipper, frivolous, and unimpressive it is. If a man were told in German to go there, could he really rise to thee dignity of feeling insulted? Having pointed out, in detail, the several vices of this language, I now come to the brief and pleasant task of pointing out its virtues. The capitalizing of the nouns I have already mentioned. But far before this virtue stands another -- that of spelling a word according to the sound of it.

One might better go without friends in Germany than take all this trouble about them. I have shown what a bother it is to decline a good (male) friend; well this is only a third of the work, for there is a variety of new distortions of the adjective to be learned when the object is feminine, and still another when the object is neuter. Now there are more adjectives in this language than there are black cats in Switzerland, and they must all be as elaborately declined as the examples above suggested.

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